Silence, sometimes is the best answer
Its not new, nor it is an over statement, neither it is submission, but silence indeed is the best possible answer you can give sometimes to help defuse any situation where the other side is constantly losing sense and judgement due to anger and aggression. And silence definitely leads to forgiveness. Without forgiveness, every situation becomes a never ending cycle of retaliation and resentment. A forgiving nature defines who you are.
The last two days have been rather eventful for him. He had been invited to his school reunion party. As, in most of his days, silence takes precedence and controls almost the major part of his days, this reunion invitation came as a welcome change. Even though he was reluctant to go initially due to several reasons, but he decided to be there to meet many of his batchmates after a really long time.
Every school in any part of the world is more or less same. So much emotions are attached to it, particularly among the mates, love, hate, jealousy, anger, sadness, depression, mischief, all are regular part of school politics, and no one can ever escape it. And, particularly in co-ed institutions, things are much deeper and complex than they look. And, very naturally so.Apart from the knowledge gathering and knowledge sharing in these growing up years, it is wisdom that takes the knowledge building exercise to a different level and shapes up the future of the young minds and souls.
Our protagonist met this other woman(kindly refer to my earlier post to get some insights) of his life couple of years back. And, Riya[name changed] turned out to be his batchmate from school. In school, they haven’t met at all and were strangers and never crossed their paths knowingly. So, this new alliance started on many fronts, stronger from the knowledge that they were school buddies. Riya was a free soul and took him on a pleasure ride, and he obliged and got blown with it in a whirlwind. And, then, things started to take a wrong turn, much to no fault of either party.
He was crestfallen at this slow turn of events of certain discoveries which led him to start hating her. And in doing so, he got caught in his own doldrums of his mind where he still wanted to be with her and never leave the pleasure ride she had taken him with.
And that is a primary reason for him to be a little apprehensive to go and attend this school reunion, where she will obviously be there. Since an eerie silence has crept over between him and Riya in recent times, he was not in the mood of going to this party.
Then there was Jennifer, his class mate and a very significant and active member of the gang he hanged around with. Jennifer is someone of the very possessive nature, fun loving, very active in getting everything done in an organised way, loved dressing up and totally obssessed about taking pictures, particularly of herself and in any subject where she has to be the center of attraction.
Jennifer loves to control things, more or less a control freak. And, she goes berserk with her moods and attitudes if her control is challenged or broken apart by others, particularly women, and that also her own batchmates from school. And, if something doesn’t happen as it should in her photography periods, particularly if the photographer instead of concentrating on her, dares to make others highlighted, then only God can save the poor soul, the photographer I mean 🙂
When that spell starts with Jennifer, then forgiveness is the best practice to deal with her.
She loves him to photograph her, single pictures, all dressed up and pretty, only highlighting herself, even in group pictures his phone camera or whatever he is using should only focus on her.
And that is what she wanted him to do in this party too. He was well aware of that.
We humans are complex machines and even more complex in our minds. We really don’t now what we gonna do a few seconds or minutes from now. So unpredictable and impulsive we are 🙂
“I love three languages of the universe : music, love and silence”
He is a gentle soul, he can take all the blame, harsh words, hatred due to jealousy, betrayal, false accusations, willful accusations and all the other vices available, but he can never hurt anyone, he cannot use any of these vices knowingly or unknowingly on anybody, he has never done anything like that in his life, nor he wishes to do the same anytime in the remaining part of his life as well.
Souls like these are rare, and bound to get hurt at every point, every moment. Yet, souls like these can stay strong by staying silent when it is most required, and forgiving the ones who inflicts unnecessary pain. Its love that leads to silence and forgiveness.
The party was brimming with activities, with close to more than 100 participants. School buddies meeting each other after they left school almost 30 years ago. But, the memories are still vivid and they come alive by the sight of all the gentlemen and women, with the drinks and laughter and bonhomie overflowing.
Riya spotted him and gave him a surprise hug, quite well aware of the critical eyes of Jennifer watching the proceedings from the sofa where she was in her cosy comfort along with some other women from her class.
Riya took him by the hand and got drinks for both of them and dragged him to a corner sofa for a heart to heart private chat. He loved it, enjoyed it, even though it was unexpected. But, by now he recognized Riya far too well. And that didn’t play at all in his mind while he was with her. Like he was in a beautiful trance or something.
All this while he almost forgot Jennifer was waiting for him. As she had already told him before coming to the party that she is dressing up for this particular party and he has to click her some real nice ones. He was aware of this and inspite of meeting Riya after quite some time since the troubled days, he went on to perform his duties of Jennifer’s photographer 🙂
And the evening went on like that. Between Riya and Jennifer, with his other batchmates, drinks and food and fellowship, reliving the lost memories, preparing the future alliances. Between all these, he carried on his photography obligations, though he got caught up in the charms of Riya, maybe as part of a divine plan 🙂
Silence is part of his basic nature
Jennifer is also obsessed with her phones, got a couple of them, big and expensive, her toys which she loves to flaunt like her dresses and accessories. Nothing wrong in it as she can very well flaunt them, its her basic right. But at times this love turns ugly into uncontrolled obsession with the views that “my stuff are better than anybody”, then the devil inside takes control.
The morning after the party. Social media shares are in full swing as everyone from the party last night got into overdrive mode to highlight their presence and exchange homilies. As these frenzied exchanges seem to die out a little, then Jennifer shared her favorite set of pictures, when no one else was sharing, she came out with her prized photos, she has to be exclusive, the very best 🙂
And then happened the unexpected. Our innocent poor soul protagonist commented on Jennifer’s post that many pictures in the set she had just shared were clicked by him. Which was true in fact !! And that was a very innocent declaration, not even a judgement of how his photograhy skills were. Just after his comment appeared on her share post, all hell broke loose. She snap commented, “you didn’t took all those, maybe just a one or two”. He quickly realized the undertone of sheer hate in that comment, but was indeed taken back at this sudden outbirst. While he was gathering up his memories to recall how many clicks he really gave yesterday, he remembered there were many, of various subjects, including Riya, Jennifer and other friends. And he do remember that there was one picture taken on Jennifer’s phone by someone other, that picture was a portrait of him with Riya. Huh…!!, he thought, is this the reason of Jennifer’s aggression ? or if not, then what it is ?
He couldn’t make sense out of it. But, casually he replied, “yes, maybe i took some precious one or two, I guess”. And suddenly came one reply from Riya, “yes, you took only just one or two, don’t you remember ?”. In a mocking tone, see, how a bigger fool you are to always be the photographer of Jennifer. He understood this tone of Riya, mocking him, rebuking him, yet loving him in her own way.
Jennifer snapped now, ” You are always harping on your photography skills. Anybody these days can be a better photographer if they have better bigger phones like mine. ” And she continued, to increase her aggression on him, to just dump all her anger and frustrations on him, all her animosity and jealousy towards many others including Riya to him.
He got hurt. He didn’t expect neither Jennifer neither Riya to snap at him, for nothing. He took all those harsh words, on a public forum, where all his batchmates were present and commenting. He could have snapped back, retaliated, upped the aggression and hit back, could have used similar harsh tones, could have insulted the same ones he loved on the public forum.
Instead, he chose to remain silent. Many thought maybe he was meek, afraid, weak. Many would have enjoyed him getting snapped at by the same ones he so loved and always talked highly about. He was well aware of these. But he ignored what other may have thought. He chose not to inflict the same hurt both Riya and Jennifer caused him. In his silence, he forgave them, he understood they were the troubled souls, caught up in their cauldron of hate and jealousy, and anger. He stayed silent.